360 Days

I'm out! . . . of my office, that is. 360 days ago, I moved my boxes in to my Memphis office. Today, I moved the last ones out.

I could not have done it had it not been for Karol's help. She selflessly offered her help---and car--to assist in getting some of the larger boxes (and my office refrigerator) to my house. I was worried I'd have to wait until the weekend and enlist the help of a neighbor, but thanks to Karol, all's moved out now! (Keep in mind that Gretta's not exactly built for moving. The small book boxes, sure, a few at a time. And even some I did get in there would only go once the top was down.)

It was bittersweet, of course. A few colleagues took my to lunch yesterday and gave me a lovely gift. It was a nice lunch and a nice chance to say goodbye. And with visitors, as I've been, this is the way it goes---we just leave. Still, I said good-bye to Linda and left with a hug. And I was able to leave her one of Mom's plant pots. Linda loves plants, as do my mother and I. And Linda's pretty darned motherly. I know that Mom would want her to have one of her pots. (Sadly, I didn't have my ducks enough in a row to have taken the pot home and cleaned it up. instead, it went to her with a bit of a sad, weary little plant in it. But I'm sure Linda will put a good plant in there and it'll have a good home.)

As I packed everything up, of course, it felt like there was so much. But once I got it all home, seeing just the boxes out of the office, well, okay, there's still a lot there. Again, though, thanks to organization, it didn't look like that much while here in my office, and I know it won't once I get it to Jax.

Most of all, though, I love the idea that I feel like I'm moving into a new home with these boxes. With my household goods, I have in the back of my head the knowledge that I hope to buy a home there in the next twelve or eighteen months and thus have yet another move ahead of me before I'm totally "home." But my office, well, there, I hope to be there for a while.

And so, this chapter closes too. (well, I will drop by tomorrow to stop the payroll deduction for parking and clean off my computer.) It's been a good year and a wonderful stopping point on my journey. But I had gotten to where I as less productive at the office than I wanted, so it was time to finally get everything out.

Besides, I've technically got only two more business days left here without packer or movers. Whoa.

Still, it felt good to have that checked off the ever-growing to-do list. Okay, and admittedly, having packed my office, I've packed all that I have to pack for this move. The packers will take care of the rest here at the house. Indeed, that's a very nice thing.

Organization is Good

Halfway through the Civil Rights Museum. my cold kicked back in, hitting me with an awful sore throat and major fatigue. It had me down again on Friday, but by Saturday, I was finally back up.

Still, moving in barely two weeks, having the cold for a week, and in general, still feeling unsettled because I can't get to find a new home until next week, I had to do something. Sure, my moving budget covers the movers packing all of my household goods. But quite frankly, I couldn't stand it. I was moving to a new state in two weeks, but nothing felt---or looked---like I would be gone soon.

So I pulled all those flattened boxes out of the attic and started finally "doing." And finally, it felt good. I packed up most of my study, my guest room, and all of the extra closets with all from my closet but what I need for the next two weeks.

Last year, I spent a lot of time organizing and cleaning out before the sale then again as I packed. When I moved in, I did even more cleaning out, and more importantly, a lot of organizing. What's that done has been to make packing this time even easier. And I suspect that unpacking will likewise be much easier. Organization, I'm just saying, is a fabulous thing.

In the meantime, I've finished my laptop article and gotten it submitted to journal editors for review. This process now begins in which I wait for two or three weeks, hoping editors are around this summer, and that someone will extend an offer to publish it. If that comes, I then play the game and contact journals with higher prestige, asking them to expedite the review, hoping for a higher placement. And if no offer comes, I send it out to journals of lower prestige than I originally started with. It's a game, but it's one we've got to play.

I've also gotten work done for the fall semester, and for the rest of this week, I'll read through the current research on the next article, keeping those things in my mind. I'll work on that through the next six months,with a goal of finishing it ideally before Christmas. Okay, so at least by the time the spring semester starts. ;-) I might travel this year for Christmas, and it'd be nice to see some snow. Maybe part of that travel will be putting myself in a cabin somewhere to finish up that writing.

And so, even with the icky cold, things are moving along. I still have a lot to pack at my office, and I plan to work on that the rest of this week. Ideally, I'll be moved out of the office by Friday morning.

Colleagues are taking me to lunch tomorrow to say good-bye, so I'm looking forward to that. And my neighbors are throwing me a party this weekend. Sure, I've been here only eleven months, but it is nice to have these final parting gatherings. I do have some great colleagues and some fabulous neighbors.

Where Did it Go?

May? hello? I seem to have missed you as you whizzed on past my life.

I sit here, realizing it's June. June! This is the month the anticipated Supreme Court decisions come out. This is the month that is the first official month of summer. This is the month I move.

Seriously? Indeed. Three weeks from today, the movers will be here at my house, getting all of my household goods on their truck. Three weeks?! I feel so unready.

Oddly, the timing is similar to last year. But with the selling of the house and all, it took me much longer to grade final papers last year. I also was busy selling the house then packing. I also spent many evenings with friends, saying good-byes and celebrating Fort Worth.

But this year, I don't need to do much packing at all. I don't have a house to sell. I don't have the many different groups of friends to make final plans with. And this leaves me with much more free time to feel like I should be doing something I'm not.

I knew, in planning my trip to Jax to find a house, that I couldn't go too far in advance of the moving date. (Owners don't like to hold a rental open for too long.) Of course, that makes it hard in terms of planning as I cannot go ahead and take care of things like connecting utilities, making mail / change-of-address arrangements, etc. But when I think about it, I'm headed there the same week that I came here to Memphis last year. The only thing I can figure is that because I'm not so consumed with selling and packing that I feel more unsettled with not having a house. Also, the realities of the difficulties I had last year of finding a place linger in the back of my mind, making me nervous for the trip coming up in two weeks.

But I'll find something. I just will. And that'll be that.

In the meantime, I've just about finished the initial article I've been working on for the last year. It's turning out to be much longer than I'd expected---close to seventy pages now. I've sent it to a colleague to read and provide comments, and that makes me nervous as can be, but I've not heard back from her yet. I know sometimes people say they'll read something then they're busy and they just don't get around to it. Really, I get that. Still, it's hard---the waiting. And work won't be over when that's done. In the next two weeks, after all, I need to finish my syllabi for the fall and get in some work on the next article (target completion date for that one is Jan. 6.)

And in the meantime, I'm still waiting for my wiring to be repaired. I've been able to put off laundry for now, but too much longer and I'll have to head to a laundromat. Not something I want to do around here. But it seems the owner of the house is unavailable to provide repair approval. I have to keep reminding myself this is not an emergency; still, it's awfully inconvenient and frustrating.

And in the meantime, Howard and I continue to sneeze. My head is less congested today than yesterday (so hopefully I can get the finishing touches on that article today). But Howard was up the last two nights, scratching his ear too much. Looks like we're headed to the vet today for that. Sigh.

And in the meantime, I'm making the list of the last few places I want to visit here in Memphis. So for the next two weeks not only will I have a lot of work to do, I will play tourist too. (I work better if I spend about five or six quality hours on a project then step away from it. So no, my work isn't the typical "eight-hour-day." Hey, this is summer time, after all! ;-) ) I don't have too many places left on my list, but enough for a couple of late afternoons.

May? I have no idea where it went. Last time I thought about it, it seemed like weeks and weeks before I'd be leaving Memphis. And now, it's just 21 days away. Alrighty, then, Here we go.

My Good Fortune

Two weeks ago brought Secretary's Day---or Administrative Professional's Day---to us. (The last three places I've been, the position is still titled secretary.) I have to say that in my life, I've been blessed with the most wonderful administrative help.

My colleagues who've provided administrative support in my professional life have been stellar. And for the most part, I even still stay in contact with them. (The first who comes to mind, I hope to see in California in January when I'm out there for a visit. (What's really odd is that our joke---from ten years ago---was that she'd always be 42 to me. Hmmmmm. ten years later, and I'm turning 40. Ah, heck, we can both be in our early 40s. Who cares if she has a daughter who's close to 30.))

Anyway, in a belated celebration (she had other lunch plans the prior week), a few of us took Linda, my current secretary, out to lunch last week. We had a lovely time. And today, Linda joined me and a few others for lunch to celebrate Cinco de Mayo (any good excuse for a margarita, si? (don't worry---I didn't go back to the office afterward). As we sat there visiting afterwards, we brought up my leaving, and Linda told me to be sure those folks in Florida knew I left here breaking my secretary's heart for having left.

How sweet is that!?

Truly, she's been my champion throughout the year, and I've been lucky to have had the pleasure of working with her. And sorry if I am breaking her heart. ;-)

And Another New Chapter Set to Begin

Go Jaguars!

Yes, my new AFC team will be my new home team: the Jacksonville Jaguars. :-) Don't worry, even if they go up against da 'Boys, my loyalties will always lie with that team from Dallas.

My long (very long) search has finally come to an end, and I'm headed to Jacksonville Florida. I've accepted a tenure-track position there with Florida Coastal, where I'll teach Torts and Remedies this coming year, adding another course in '09-10.

It's certainly been a long process. This spot came up at an odd time, and we had not been connected during the traditional season last fall. But this past January, this ball finally started rolling.

In early March, I did the committee interview over the phone, followed by another phone interview with a company designed to rate my talent for teaching. I did well on that, and they invited me to campus for the multi-day interview at the end of March. The other nice thing was that I got to see the city, and I really liked it!

What's even better than all of that is that I also really liked the people. They were friendly, open, welcoming. Okay, sure, so they were trying to sell themselves as much as I was me. But the thing about the multi-day interview is that if people are not being genuine, it's easier to figure that out when you're there for so long. I cannot say it in any better way, really, than just that it completely felt "right."

And then came the long wait for the offer. Their school had spring break the week after my visit, so that added extra time in the wait. But finally, an offer came Monday, we negotiated over the week, and I accepted yesterday. WooHoo!!

And yes, Jacksonville is just about on the coast: eighteen miles away. I find the beach and the sound of the ocean to be especially healing to my soul, so I'm tickled to be so close.

Other things? well, yes, I think Howard will be happy. I know already of at least two fenced-in dog parks in the city. The city itself is the largest city in land area in the US, but population-wise it reminds me of Fort Worth or even Memphis. Demographic seem similar to Fort Worth. It's in northern Florida, so it's more like southern Georgia than Miami. It's large enough to have a symphony orchestra, get tours of Broadway shows, and have an NFL team, but ti's still small enough that you can become a part of a community. For me, it's the ideal size. (I usually consider a city's population much more than its geographical size.)

My relocation package will take care of the move, and I'll head down in mid-June to look for a house. I'll rent first, with the goal of buying perhaps next summer---once I know more about the neighborhood I want to live in. The big move will occur probably in earl July. I"m still trying to plan a trip for me in early August, but I'll need to work that around a faculty orientation scheduled early that month too.

In the meantime, I'm writing final exams, which my students take next week and the week after. I"ll have to grade those (painful) then work on the article I could not focus on with this job prospect that came up. A few folks are also trying to work out schedules for visits next month, so it's going to be busy around here!

I did it! A year ago, I took a chance by leaving my familiar life to do something I wanted more than anything else, taking the risk that with only a one-year gig, the future would work out. And it has. Beautifully. This new place seems like just the right fit. And so the next step is about to begin: me, as a Floridian.

Sometimes You've Just Gotta Wing It!

I worked on my presentation late into the night Wednesday, and I was up early to go over it one more time. I had typed out my notes, and, at $1 a page, printed them Wednesday night. Sure, that's crazy expensive, but it turned out to be well worth it.

All of the presenaers met at 8:15 a.m., organizing the three sets of panels of presenters. This program was slated for three hours, and we had three groups of presenters. I was in the second group, being the third of three in that group to speak.

My friends and colleagues Janet and Lisa were there with me, and about two-thirds through the first group, I started getting more nervous. We were in one of the larger rooms, and it was near full--close to 150 people there. I took a couple of deep breaths, Janet gave me a nod of confidence, and I knew I was prepared. This would be fine.

Then it was our turn. I took my laptop up to the podium during the short break between panels, and it was then that I learned that my laptop's VGA port has no screw holes. What? Yes--no screw holes to keep the cable plugged in. Instead, when I plugged in the cable to connect my computer to the projector, the cable simply fell off. The tech guy came over, left the room, and returned with black electrical tape. He tried taping the cable to the computer, but half-way through the first speaker, it fell out again. He tried to fix it again, but a quick-fix was no good. So he waited until time for me to speak.

When I got up, he came over and started trying to fix things again. I, of course, had to go ahead and start--we were on a schedule, after all! And so I began, and for the first few minutes, he was right beside me, trying hard to fix things--even having to reboot my computer once. And me? Well, I did what I had to: went ahead anyway. And after a few minutes, we finally just told the man to leave. He was creating a distraction, and nothing was getting solved.

And so, I had to wing it--no power point, no graphs, no helpful cues for me o my screen as I spoke. But you know, it was just fine.

I had several people come up and speak to me afterwards, many saying how much they liked my idea and implementation of my solution to addressing two different groups of students who have competing needs. And others simply complemented my delivery of the presentation. One woman said I handled the technology problem in a flawless manner, and she loved that I even used it as an example of distractions.

So in all, it went very well. Sure, not having the power point was a problem, but I think I might be even a little more memorable because I didn't let the problem throw me off.

Oh, and the $11 notes, of course, sure did come in handy.

Work, Work, and More Work

I am often amused when people think I actually have off a month in December. Sure, classes are over, but I have worked daily, and all day, since returning from Houston.

Okay, granted, I did take a week on the beach, and that was great. And I allowed myself four days for Christmas. But that's hardly a month! :-)

Anyway, both of my syllabi finally are complete and posted online, and students have gotten word. One syllabus was especially difficult to craft as the book covers so much more material than we'll possibly have time to cover. And I like to have as complete a syllabus as possible when the semester begins. So I had to make all the decisions now as to what gets how much coverage. From a 950-page book, I had to limit our coverage to less than 600 pages for the semester. And the hardest part is that the material I had to omit would be very interesting. But there is only so much time.

I'm structuring this particular class differently too. It will create more work for me, but I think it will be good for the students. And in this particular class, I'm going from all first-year students to, I suspect, mostly graduating third-year students. They are bored with school and ready to be out. This, then, makes it most challenging to keep them engaged. But with my approach, although some will grumble at first for having to actually do more work, I think it will create a more positive environment in the classroom.

I've also worked hard on my presentation for NYC. My time to present is very limited, but the audience is expected to be quite large. And this time, it's a national audience of all types of professors and deans. But I've analyzed all of my data, put it into a great power point, and I've even incorporated another component, which will be great--if it doesn't fall flat. ;-)

And so I'm off to NYC tomorrow. I'll meet up with two girlfriends/colleagues, one from Seattle and one from Wisconsin, tomorrow night, and we're sight-seeing on Wednesday. We have tickets to a show, Cyrano (with Kevin Kline & Jennifer Garner), on Wednesday night, then I present Thursday morning. I hope to see my good friend from Fort Worth Thursday night, then Friday it's a reception in the Rainbow Room. I suspect I'll sneak away from programs one afternoon for a museum too. And I'm back toward home late Saturday afternoon. Whew!

What I'm quite happy about is that this is the last trip I have planned. The fall was quite a whirlwind---with a trip out of state almost every three weeks starting just after Labor Day. They were all good, but frankly, I'm tired. But I am just so darned blessed to have such an incredible neighbor who's taken care of Howard and Sophie almost every time.

Ah--speaking of Howard. I took a break yesterday afternoon and walked him over to Overton Park. It was sunny and gorgeous, and lots of dogs were out in the large field in front of the pond. And they were all off leash. Howard sniffed some, and he whined--this pitiful sad whimper of, "Why can't I play with the other dogs like that?" I thought and thought, and I decided, the Sunday of a holiday weekend would be the safest time to try it. And so I did it. I unleashed Howard.

Well---never again! I had known better, honestly, but I always did kind of wonder--maybe he'd grown out of his running? Maybe he'd be better? And so I did just have to try. At first, he was great. He stayed right near me for a couple of minutes, then he played a little. Then he ran a little farther away. And like we do at any fenced park, I then yelled, "Howard!" very excitedly, and he looked up at me, and like at other parks, came loping over, pretty much grinning. And then he trotted off again, finding people to say hello to. And then, all I can guess, is that the wind changed. For suddenly, he put his nose up in the air, sniffed, and he ran. Fast. He galloped off toward, where else, the zoo! (Yes, I know--dogs, off-leash, right near the zoo? Well, none of the other dogs notice. But not Howard!) Another dog was chasing after him, with me not too far behind.

Fortunately, of course, Howard gets very easily distracted with his nose, and he forgot about the zoo (and its parking lot) in favor of many many other smells in between. (When we got to the perimeter of the field, the other dog gave up and returned, dutifully, to his owners.) Howard kept on going. Fortunately, he was turning back toward the direction to go home, but I did not want him crossing McLean--a very busy, and fast, street.

But we were saved by litterers! Yes--litter bugs came to the rescue. Now, what's odd to me is that any time we've walked near the zoo parking lot, we've always found discarded bread--from sandwiches, from hot-dog buns, something. And this time, thank goodness, was no different. So when Howard came upon this gold mine of bread (WooHoo my little carb addict!), he had to stop and eat. Actually, he, sensing me right behind him, grabbed a mouthful and ran off. But he eventually gave into the yummy white-bread flavor and stopped to chew. And he heeded my "wait" command, as I approached and releashed him.

Ah, well, I made the thought-out decision to try. And we tried. But now I know for sure: never again. :-)


Anyway, yes, after Saturday, finally, I'll be home for a while. And instead of me traveling soon, I think I'll have some guests actually visit me this spring. I've held off on seeing several sights around here, waiting to share them with others. But I suspect Lisa will be here in February, and we'll definitely hit the Civil Rights museum. (will be interesting this year, with it being the 40th anniversary since Dr. King's death--at the location of the museum.) I'm going to try to hold off any other guests until after the first of March, though. I must get this article I've been working on finished so I can submit it for publication by March 10. (Other than Lisa's visit (if she can make it in Feb.), pretty much every weekend between now and then will have to be spent on the article.)

But I also will plan some trips. My best friend will be leaving Hawaii this summer, so I want to try to make it to see her before then. She and I have also talked about meeting on the West Coast for a long weekend. I really want to finally go see my brother (although next January's meeting will be in San Diego, so I know I'll be there then). And I'm hoping to plan an overseas trip to celebrate my birthday this summer. It's one of those "big" ones, and I've decided the best thing I can do for me is to travel and ring in the next decade. Ireland? Spain? Haven't totally decided. But I am leaning most heavily toward Europe. Maybe Paris? Hmmmm. We'll see!

Ah, more work to do in the morning before catching my flight. It'll be this way for all the next weekends until this article is done. Umm Hmm. And life in academia is so cush? As if! ;-)

Catching Up

It took me a few days to get over some pretty severe jetlag from my trip. But on Monday, I still had to face what I left here: my exams.

I went to school, picked them up, and said hello to colleagues, dropping off a few gifts for those who took care of things while I was gone. With a huge box full of exams and my books for making syllabi, I was back out.

It took me the next week to finish grading. I would work some at home, some at various restaurants, and often at the local coffee place. But finally, they were all done--late Saturday night.

On Sunday, I flew to Houston to my sister's house for Christmas. I stayed three nights, and it was a great visit. Kids from six to fourteen (and my twenty-year-old niece) provided lots of laughter, and it was wonderful to see everyone. The trip was, of course, very short, meaning there wasn't time for lots of personal visits with anyone, but that's to be expected this time of year. Although the movie we saw this year was far from great, the tamales on Christmas night were fabulous and made the perfect wrap-up for the holiday.

Back to Memphis on Wednesday, since then I've worked hard on my syllabi for the coming semester. I'll be teaching a new class, so this one is taking a lot of extra work; I've already got sixty-eight students registered for the class, so that'll mean two very large classes this spring.

From here on, I'll put together my presentation for NYC, where I'm headed on the 1st and hopefully take a little time to enjoy the bowl game tomorrow night.

But in the meantime, although belated, Merry Christmas!

Our Program

Why Kampala? For the past week, I’ve been here teaching at the International Law Institute (the ILI). The ILI began in Washington DC back in the 50s. Part of the goal originally was to assist Germany in rebuilding its legal system after the war. Eventually, they decided to branch out, and about fifteen years ago, began the ILI of Uganda. It is now also known as the African Center For Legal Excellence.

The ILI reminds me a lot of the State Bar function of providing continuing education for lawyers, but the ILI does even more. The ILI offers not only week-long or two-week-long courses such as the one I’ve been here teaching, but it also offers diploma courses that can run for as long as three months.

The course I've been teaching (along with my colleague Mimi) lasted just one week (although one participant today asked if we could stay and extend the program another week), and we had lawyers from several countries who came to attend the course: six from Uganda, two from Rwanda, one from Malawi, one from Tanzania, and one from Nigeria. Working with these attorneys has been incredibly fulfilling—enriching, even. Sure, I’m the one here to teach them, but I’ve learned so much from them as well.

Here we all are--Mimi and me, the participants, and the ILI staff involved in our program.



Five of our Ugandan participants work for the Ministry of Justice here in Kampala. The Ministry acts much like our state bars; it serves as the disciplinary authority over attorneys here. Clients can submit complaints about lawyers’ practice to the ILI, and the ILI staff attorneys (which is what our participants are), notify the attorney of the complaint and sometimes have to prosecute the complaint.

Our other Ugandan participant was our oldest participant. He works in private practice, and he is partner in his law firm. He is quite fascinating. His wife is a judge here, and his children, all in school in Australia, have quite impressive careers---one is a biomedical engineer, two others are other types of engineers, and, he told us with a grin, the other is a fashion designer. This participant obviously read a lot and paid a lot of attention to goings on elsewhere; he made a very clever joke one day by referencing the lyrics to Hotel California, but he did have to ask me what, exactly, was a “soccer mom.”

The two participant from Rwanda were a bit more difficult to get to know. The gentleman, who works for the Rwanda Tea Authority, was quiet, and I got the impression his mind wasn’t totally plugged into our program. The female (who worked for a bank) spoke French as her first language, and although she could speak English very well, she had a difficult time understanding it. I’m sure it was quite exhausting for her each day to have to listen and translate what Mimi and I were saying, especially with our American accents.

The Malawian was likewise quiet. He was very sweet, but just quiet and a bit shy. He works as a prosecutor for the Malawi Anti-Corruption Bureau. He was very bright, just quiet.

Finally, the Nigerian, well, he was quite a character—a great one, but one nonetheless. We were a bit worried at first, because he was “sent” to our course by his employers based on some problems that had come out in his writing—problems that cost the private firm he works for, or perhaps it’s client, a great deal of money. He spoke much more loudly than anyone else, and he seemed to have a strong ego. But our worries were needless. He wasn’t pompous or deeply arrogant; he was just Nigerian.

I’ve learned that, as a Kenyan told me over lunch one on Friday, in general, East Africans are relatively quiet and reserved. The loudest among them are the Kenyans, but the Tanzanians and Ugandans are all very quiet. West Africans, on the other hand, are generally loud, emotive, and animated. Thus, if you put one Nigerian in a room full of East Africans, he will stand out distinctly

Most of the group was in their late twenties or early thirties, with the majority of them married. Most found it quite odd that neither Mimi nor I had children. Actually, it was a bigger concern that I’d not had children than that I’d never married; in fact, no one asked me about a husband. Hilda, one of the participants, pulled me aside before the end of the program on the last day and told me I really should have children. She said, “Who will you leave your legacy to? Your money and things?” I told her about my nieces and assured her I’d be happy to leave it to them, provided, of course, they held up the promise to be good to me in my old age. ;-) I added that by me not having children, it sure did make it easier to travel to Africa for two weeks. Hilda was please with that, and agreed that being able to up and travel without concern for kids was a benefit of not having any.

The ILI is in an old colonial house not too far from the Mosa Courts or the city. The first thign you notice upon getting out of the car at the ILI is the smell. The air is filled with the smell of flowers--something similar to a gardenia, I believe. The ILI is, I suppose, about a five minute drive in the city. Our classroom was on the top floor, essentially in a room built on top of the roof. we had our tea breaks each morning under two canopies atop the roof, and we ate lunches htere as well. Here are two views from the rooftop (it's only about two stories tall), showing the incredible sights.

All's Well in Exam World

When I landed in Detroit, I found a payphone and called my colleague who's proctoring my exam. Then, brainstorm! Why not email? (I paid for a few hours' internet access through a popular airport service back in Memphis.)

So I found a place with a plug and a draft beer, jumped online, and emailed him and my secretary. I'm happy to say, all is going just fine with the exam. Whew! I've allowed my students to choose to type their essay answers on their laptops if they choose, but none of their other profs have so allowed. Huh? But how much easier to grade! Oh well.

Of course, this allows my colleague to see how easy it is to proctor an exam where they use laptops, so maybe next semester, he'll let 'em too. (I'm my students' only prof who hasn't been teaching for nearly twenty years, if that tells you anything about technology comfort levels---not that I'm trying to stereo-type, but, well, come on.)

Don't worry---the school uses special software the students must download in order to take the exam on a laptop. The software locks away the rest of their hard drive, making it virtually impossible to access any other files; my exam is closed-book, after all.

I do hate that it's my first doctrinal exam to give, and I'm not even there! I am curious as can be, though, if any students finish early. Tick, tock. I know there are seventy-two very tired students in Memphis right now. Their stress, for this exam, should end in about twenty or thirty minutes. Bless their hearts. ;-)

No News is, Well, No News

It's been two weeks, and so far, I've gotten no invitations to visit a campus. Out of the interviews, I promptly received one rejection letter. But I've heard not a peep from the others.

This means one of two things. First, there's a high likelihood that some schools simply never send the rejection letter. Yes, I agree: how rude. At most, a school interviewed probably forty-eight people in DC (two schools split their interview teams in half), and to send less than a mere forty-some-odd letters should be nothing. It's at a minimum common courtesy. (But then again, there's nothing common about this interview process.)

The other possibility is that I'm simply down on the list. Invitations to visit and participate in the on-campus interview have been extended to the top choices. This could lead to a few different paths. First, those folks might get and accept offers. Second, those folks might not present as great a package during the extended interview, leading teams to move on down the list (and maybe call me). Third, an offer is extended, but the candidate accepts what's a better offer to the candidate elsewhere, leading the team to extend the offer to someone else, or, if running out of those already invited to visit campus, maybe call me.

Regardless, it's a a very long shot. The more people I talk to, the more I hear stories of leading faculty members at places who had to do the DC thing two, three, or more times. The competition is intense, and a lot depends on finding a school looking for someone to teach things you teach. Besides, I'm in the company of about seven or eight hundred other people right now who are going through the process and don't have spots or potential spots. Perhaps for me, at least, this fall was merely a warm-up. ;-)

What happens from here? I focus on the end of the semester and my exam for my students; then focus on Africa (assuming that's still on; we haven't gotten confirmation on tickets, worrying me they don't have enough registered participants to pay for us to come over); then focus on NYC; and focus on the spring semester. In the middle of this, I improve the paper package I can present next fall by working hard to get an article out in the spring submission and another in the summer. I'll be busy.

Oh, a job? Well, the interview cycle for visiting gigs hits around February, so I'd do that, looking for another chapter for next year.

Yes, something still could work out. But in realistic terms, I'm prepared for Plan B. In other words, expect this adventure of mine on the road to a permanent spot to be extended. Perhaps I have more sights to see before I get to where I'm supposed to be. :-)

Plan Ahead & Be Nice

First--Be Nice. I was so exhausted yesterday evening, and I didn't want to be in the midst of the "high stress" of everyone else in the hotel, so my plan was room service. Of course, lots of folks were in the same shape as me, so I wasn't at all surprised when I called room service and learned it would be an hour wait. I told Mabel that was fine, I knew they must be extremely busy this weekend. She told me that yes, indeed they were. She had twenty orders lined up ahead of mine. I told her that was fine and I understood. She truly seemed so happy I was not grumpy.

And my dinner arrived in twenty-seven minutes. Hmmm---could it be that Mabel moved me up in line because I didn't complain or gripe of fuss at her--for something she didn't cause? Maybe. Or maybe they all of a sudden had extra staff come in. Whatever the reason, I was nice to her, and that made me feel good just for the sake of being nice.

Second--Be prepared. I didn't have interviews scheduled today, and I knew I wouldn't be doing the "schmoozing" at receptions, looking for a last-minute interview (very rare occurrence). Still, I packed two suits--just in case. And I awoke this morning to an email from the recruitment chair from one of the schools I met with yesterday. She wanted to know if I could meet with their other team today. (They are hiring several spots, so they split their committee in two.) What did this mean? She said it was because the people I'd met with yesterday enjoyed talking to me so much, and the other two were more of the crim law folks---something I'd love to teach. Of course, it could be that the other two I met with were split---one wanted to invite me for the call-back and the other didn't, and so maybe this second interview was a tie-breaker. Regardless, I met with them today, and again, it felt great! We'll see.

As for the schools, as I said, I interviewed with a wide variety. I've met with schools from the second, third, and fourth tiers and even one not ranked (the school is too new to be ranked). I met with a committee from one of the oldest law schools in the country--and one of the newest. The teaching packages would be different at each place. The climate would be different at a couple of places. I'm sure the pay would be different at each place. And my place within the institution would be quite different. Some schools are heavier into teaching, and some heavier into scholarship. Some are balanced.

Of course, none of those differences matter unless I'm faced with choices. And if that happens, it's not a simple matter of tier or salary. It's finding the right "fit" for me. So we'll see what happens over the next couple of weeks. But in the meantime, keep those positive thoughts a-comin'! They've really made me feel good. :-)

The Meat (not meet) Market

Breathe in.

Breath out.

Now I can.

This round is over. (I hope I’ve made to the next round for some places!)

Indeed, I had all of my interviews today. It’s nice because this way I can return home tomorrow, and tomorrow morning I can focus on some class prep for next week! (Egads, I am behind where I like to be on that!)

How’d it go? Well, Monday afternoon after the first one, I wanted to vomit. No, seriously. I wanted to vomit. But I didn’t feel like that once today! (And fortunately, I didn’t vomit on anyone either, like we heard (in the candidates’ workshop, held yesterday) another candidate had done a couple of years ago. Ouch.)

Indeed, the experience Monday was fundamental in my feeling prepared today. I had great discussions about all three of my current scholarly pursuits, about teaching, about faculties, etc. And I was me. No—as recommended to us yesterday, I was the best me I could be . . . for thirty minutes at a time. :-)

Where do I go from here? Back to the waiting game. Yes, now I must wait to see if any of the schools I spoke to will call me for the campus interview. (Where I must be the best me I can be for a day-and-a-half.) What are my chances? Well, like I said, I think the interviews went well. And so, I’ve done all I can. But it will completely depend on who else they talked to who have teaching interests similar to my own and if that other person (or people) bring more to the table.

We heard yesterday too that we should keep in mind that’s part of the deal: some years, many schools are hiring for things you teach or want to teach, and the next year, maybe not. In other words, we were told that even without success this year, don’t give up. After all, the message was more about the fact that everyone in the room had interviews. On paper, we made it. We had the necessary credentials (at least in the eyes of some committees). Now it was a matter of finding the right fit, and sometimes that takes time. How great was it we were here? Well, close to 1000 people threw their hats into the ring to apply for spots. And the word was that many of those folks were not invited to make the trip here.

No, I have no idea when I’ll hear anything—positive or negative. For now, it’s back to teaching and some intensive work on what will be my job talk at any place that invites me to visit.

Actually, for now, it’s a glass of wine and some room service. :-)

Oh -- and Breathe.

Gray Skies Part

I’ve been in such a state of turmoil with figuring out what my job talk would be. This has weighed heavily on me for the past several weeks, but I knew that the topic I want to write on next would need much too much work to get to a state worthy of intellectual discussion. The work I’m currently doing would not be “scholarly” enough. (It’s good work and will contribute to the pedagogy of law school, but it’s not about legal doctrine.) The work I’ve already done that’s being published just isn’t right for it. And so how did I find that Goldilocks “just right” piece? Argh!

Then today happened. A friend here chatted with me about what to discuss relative to scholarship. In other words, no, I didn’t ace that part of my interview here. But fortunately, she was willing to offer some words of advice. At first, I felt like things were now utterly hopeless—what I had wasn’t sufficient for discussing scholarship or my scholarly agenda. And knowing that, I knew it would effect how I would act and react in the coming interviews.

That feeling lasted about three minutes, then my gray clouds parted: I knew! I have something I worked on a few years ago that is sufficiently developed to use it for interviews on Friday. Further, I think it’ll turn into a great job talk—especially because the area of law is not one that (as far as my research has revealed) is a hot topic for any of my interviewers. Even better still, it heavily focuses on doctrine and it’s a small niche in the law that ties so nicely to my background from before law school and the work I did with persons with mental illness.

Have I found my “agenda”? Maybe. But what I do know is that I’m so much better prepared for Friday and any call backs. I’m actually now—finally—feeling settled with this area of the interviews and talks. This deserves a double: WooHoo!! WooHoo!!

This is THE Week

My wisdom last week helped, but I've still felt out of sorts and a bit buried. I've forgotten too many friends' birthdays (sorry Susan, Judy, Melissa . . .), my cupboard's bare, and I committed the ultimate dog's person awfulness: I didn't notice how bad Howard's ears had gotten.

Yes, Howard's allergic to Memphis--or at least to something here. According to the doc, it's common in dogs around here. And thanks to those allergies, Howard's got an infection of the yeast sort in his ears. We finally went to see the doc on Wednesday, and I was mortified at the goo in his ears. Sure, it built up slowly, but still.

Fast forward. On Friday evening, I faced a bad haircut, way too much work that needed to be done, and apprehension about the coming week. Well, I've worked with the cut, and in reality, it's fine. I've gotten all the revisions done on my pending article, and I'm prepped for class tomorrow. Check, check, and check.

Granted, the apprehension remains. I'm trying to view that as what I need to create the positive energy to get through the next five days. My first interview is tomorrow followed by several more in DC on Friday. Each one is for very different spots at very different schools. All would work. If I wind up with a choice, well, these interviews are for me to learn about the schools as much as they are for the schools to learn about me.

With all that had to be done, I have been crazy-busy all weekend, of course. (Part of that included the monthly mowing of the yard and cleaning of the back patio and a couple of work-outs--for sanity's sake.) But finally tonight I took some down-time and watched Brothers & Sisters--the best show on TV. And I giggled without reserve at the scenes with the two daughters and mother. I know that my mom, like Nora, means the very best when we speak and wants only the very best for me. And I know she worries and only wants to be supportive. I do know that. And so it's so incredibly nice to feel a bit validated by,yes, a fictional TV show, in seeing those adult daughters and mothers communicate poorly and get frustrated and tiptoe--and then slam---into feelings . . . . Love ya, Mom.

And so, this is going to be a big and busy week. But it'll be what it'll be. And that'll be okay.

Wisdom

I spent time today chatting with a colleague. It's funny--everyone seems surprised that he and I chat and even went to lunch; he's not the social kind. But he and I share the same students, and it's an incredible thing to be able to be validated that I'm not the only one "bugged" by a particular, well, smarty-pants. ;-) Anyway, so the chat today left me refreshed and ready for more.

This colleague has been teaching for years and thus has a lot of wisdom to share, so his encouragement helped tremendously. But even more, he encouraged me regarding another difficult issue I'm facing--the challenging of my scholarship. I've been on edge regarding this "challenge" for a couple of weeks, but after today, I'm finally at peace.

As for the particular issue, I can now (today, for the first time) see the positive: I've been seriously challenged by an overly educated professor from the west coast who disagrees with everything I say. Gulp. Breathe. And re-group. See, here's the up side: I'm so much more prepared now for any questions I get next week during my interviews. And that, people, is indeed priceless.

I got there through that chat this afternoon, but even more so, in the middle of my funk, I received this in my "Daily Insight" email inbox from Yoga Journal:

Life has its ups and downs. While it may be tempting to wallow in our misery during the downs, or quickly move past the source of our despair, that isn't always the healthiest way to deal with a crisis.

It's human nature to avoid the emotional roadblocks that pepper the path to spiritual maturity, to seek instead the slow and steady pace of the ordinary traveler. Yet reaching higher spiritual ground requires an extraordinary traveler. It demands the kind of change that comes from facing challenges—emotional, spiritual, or physical—and growing as a result.

A spiritual initiation—an exceptionally difficult life passage that shakes your foundations and makes you question your purpose—is just this sort of change. Disguised as a loss, it's actually an opportunity to strengthen the thread of awareness that connects your outer inner selves, a chance to travel deeper into the soul.

Wow. This was exactly what I needed--at exactly the right time. My foundations in my scholarship were indeed shaken. But the above passage and another nugget of insight I got today have both lifted me up back where I need to be. Yes, I'm still stressed. I'm still worried. But the extra wisdom helps so very much---as do the warm, fuzzy thoughts. :-)

This other nugget---yes, there's a little more to this story, but I want to be up early, so I'll simply promise to share the other amazing wisdom that was given to me today in a later post.

Football, Fall, and Funks

Fall is often my favorite season. I love the wonderful change of crisp air in the mornings, the sound of football games, and the turn of the leaves. Unfortunately, this fall, for the last bit of time, has been overshadowed by a funk.

I guess it started when I got back from KC. The nearing dates of the interviews in DC are constantly on my mind. KC was so nice because I could be around people who "got" my stress and didn't feed me the, well, irritating false support: "It'll all be just fine." Not that I'm wallowing in worry, but my stress is real. Still, with those well intentioned "it'll be fine" folks, I smile nicely, repressing the ever-building frustration. Sigh. I do know they mean well, but it isn't helping--at all.

Football, of course, didn't help the funk this weekend. On the up side: I can only hope the most recent controversy brewing in College Station will be the cherry topping needed to get us a new head coach. And although 'da Boys didn't pull off the win this week, they did give New England a better game than any other competitor had so far this season.

Being in this incredible forest of giant oaks (and other trees), I had looked forward to a gorgeous fall. Sadly, due to the drought conditions, it looks like most trees will simply drop leaves---assuming they ever do turn. But we did get over an inch of rain yesterday. That was nice.

And yes, with the dates of interviews looming, November is hard to plan for. I have to hope for second interviews at some campuses, and thus, I have to be ready to give a job-talk pretty much all month. A job talk is where you speak for twenty or so minutes about your current work of scholarship, and for the next twenty minutes, you're questioned about it. Some people ask questions in genuine attempts to help you further your research and thesis. Some, though, ask questions merely to try to look smart in front of their colleagues. Oh yes, you know the kind. Wonderful.

In the middle of all that, I still have no actual plans--or even airline tickets (Eek!) for my December Africa trip. That wouldn't be so bad except that it turns out I'll instead be leaving actually in November (29 or 30). That's like six weeks from now! Yowza!

Still, the more we try to plan for the trip, the more excited I get. I do, of course, need to find a travel doc around here for the anti-malaria drugs. My yellow fever shot's already done, so the oral meds should be all that I need! We're planning on trying to stay one or two nights at a place that looks like pure paradise--Chumbe Island---an island limited to about fourteen guests at a time, where the "bungalows overlook the sea and it takes just 30 seconds to stroll from the comforts of your bungalow hammock to feeling the warm tropical ocean lapping at your feet." Ahhhhhh....

And I did finally make it to the Dixon gardens on Sunday to catch the last day of the George Rodrique exhibit. It was fabulous! I'd had no idea how much I'd love each painting of Blue Dog.



So it's not as if evething's negative. It's just a funk. And this too shall pass. :-)

Busy, Busy

Kansas City:

The last week seems to have flown by! Last week found me with things going on almost every night. Between my dance class, yoga, dinner with a colleague, a missed, but planned, night at the museum, then packing for Kansas City, whew! Of course, in all of that, I had to put the finishing touches on my presentation for the conference this past weekend, teach, catch up on reading, etc., etc.

The trip to KC was great! I flew in early enough on Friday to have lunch with my colleague and dear friend from Wisconsin. She and I had a wonderful visit all weekend and also enjoyed dinner out on Saturday evening. Sunday, we went to the Jazz Museum and the Museum of the Negro Baseball League.

Of course, the real purpose of the trip was the conference, and as always, it was wonderful. I picked up many tips on teaching and some great ideas for fresh approaches. The people who go to these conferences are the ones with the true love of what they do--the innovative educators. Spending time with them always recharges my batteries a bit.

Football:

And then there are the football games! I missed the one Saturday evening--opting instead to talk for hours to Lisa. But when we got back to the hotel, someone said the Ags had pulled it off. I waited, hardly patiently, to get confirmation of that fact on the big-screen in the hotel lounge, and finally---Whoop! Indeed, the Ags made it! And now, they're in first place in the Big 12 South. I just hope we show up to really play---both first and second half---against Tech this weekend.

And of course, last night was one of the most exciting ends of a Cowboys game I've ever seen. I'm not at all in an approving state of mind regarding the last-second time-outs called by coaches when a kicker is kicking a career-long field goal, but it is within the bounds of the rules. (It happened to a team Saturday night and to da 'boys last night.) But the Cowboys kicker pulled it off and made that field goal TWICE---moving the cowboys to 5-0. Fabulous!

Work:

I'll need to spend a lot of free time over the next two weekends with my scholarly work. First, I need to read over and over my article coming out in publication this fall, readying myself for any questions about it during interviews at the end of this month. And second, I need to get my work-in-progress to a state such that I'll be ready to give a job talk on it.

Of course, in the meantime, I have to keep up with my current schedule. This includes getting a new course ready to go for next semester. First step: choose a text. At least I've gotten that narrowed down to between two books.

For now, though, I better get out the door to go get some of these things done!

And Then There are Days Like Today

I spend a lot of days these days feeling loads of stress.

But then there are days like today.

Before class, a student dropped by to clarify some points, and in the conversation, she said (genuinely) that I was an excellent teacher. How great that felt! (Students complain that they want feedback, but gosh, professors like it too.) She also mentioned how much she appreciated that she could tell I really wanted the students to learn.

During class, another student was struggling a little, and I rephrased things and explained the topic again. After class, he came up to me and thanked me. He essentially said he felt bad sometimes when he didn't get things, but he really appreciated my patience in helping him understand.

After class, another student dropped by. He said he just wanted to tell me "thank you." He said up until my class that afternoon, he'd been having a really bad few days, and that most of today earlier he'd done a lot of questioning about whether he should be in law school. He then said that after my class, he felt lots better and was happy again. He knew he was doing the right thing by being here. (He's a second career guy; I know how that feels.)

And after work, several of us went out to celebrate some colleagues' birthdays. Of course, for me, it's half social but half interview. I know that. But it went well I think. More than half of the committee members were there, and it all seemed quite positive. Of course, you cannot please everyone. I mentioned an innovative teaching technique I had used today in class, and everyone loved it---but one guy. (let's just say my students now know the tune of the Yellow Rose of Texas.) Anyway, so he looked at me like I was a little nuts. But hey, if it helps my students learn this very complex contract doctrine, I'm okay with that. After all, I am trying to teach, right?

Breathe . . . .


And now, I'll go enjoy Survivor and ---- TaDaaaa! the season premiere of Grey's! :-)

Thirty Days

thirty days in the hole

sing it with me: Thirty days in the hole....

No---of course not the same sort of "thirty days" and not at all the same "hole" as Humble Pie spoke of in the classic song. But it still feels like what I'm facing is thirty days in a deep dark hole.

My thirty days---it's thirty days until the big dance in DC. And my dance card is way too empty. Yikes. I'm nauseated. A lot.

I keep telling myself that no matter what, it's okay. After all, I'm licensed to practice in TX, my job here ends by mid-May, and I'm paid through then end of August. And the savings from selling my house could pay for my move back to TX to practice and not teach. In a lot of ways, I have a cushion.

But---dare I actually reveal my true desire to someone other than my dog and cat? Okay. Here goes: I want to teach. I love teaching. First, yes, I love teaching. But I also really want to write more. Granted, for me, my priority has to be to my students. But next in line---I want to write. Why? In writing, I learn. And I love to learn. I hope that I can also contribute to others in my writing. But for now, I feel so new in that process . . . . But I really do want to teach. And right now, I don't have the odds on my side to get that job for next year. Breathe.....

Breathe . . . . . .


Still. When my belly dance instructor told me last night that one thing we do in belly dancing is to always engage our upper back muscles--was she kidding??!!?? Each upper back and neck muscle I have has been tensed for the last four weeks! As if I need to work to hold those muscles tight. (granted, I did have to learn the correct hand hold---it's called "always show the ring." Love it.)

Anyway, so here I sit, thirty days from the dance without enough dances planned. I spent all day Sunday targeting places with CVs, so hopefully I'll start to hear from more folks next week.

In the meantime, I don't expect a lot of great nights of sleep. And I expect those upper back and neck muscles will continue to tense.

Ah----thirty days in the hole.